How to Practice Self-Forgiveness

Life is full of complex emotions—and finding a healthy way to deal with them isn’t always easy. Take, for example, self-forgiveness. Many may find the ability to forgive others easier than forgiving themselves. It’s critical, however, to understand the importance of practicing self-forgiveness in a healthy way.

The first thing to understand about forgiving yourself is that you’re not letting yourself off the hook. It’s also not a sign of weakness. In fact, practicing self-forgiveness means that you accept the behavior, that you accept it happened and you are ready to move on.

4 R’s of self-forgiveness:

• Responsibility: taking responsibility and accepting that your actions have hurt others can help you avoid feeling excessive regret and guilt
• Remorse: it’s natural to feel shame and regret but making a mistake doesn’t make you a bad person
• Restoration: forgiving yourself is an important part of the process and it’s more likely to last when you feel like you’ve earned it
• Renewal: Understand your behavior and why you may have acted that way—this will give you the opportunity to learn and grow as you move forward

 

What to do with the guilt

Guilt is a powerful emotion. Overall, feeling guilty is a reminder of how your actions can affect others. But dwelling on this feeling is not healthy. Instead, accept guilt as a motivator for improving yourself.

Another technique to help with self-forgiveness is practicing self-compassion. This technique is based on treating yourself with the same care that you would show a loved one.

 

You can cultivate self-compassion by:

• Changing negative thinking and self-talk
• Journaling about your emotions, past mistakes and challenging situations
• Nurturing yourself by using self-care
• Giving yourself words of encouragement and love whenever you’re feeling a negative emotion
• Reminding yourself that you’re doing the best you can

 

Another tip for practicing self-forgiveness is to remember that nobody is perfect. You are worthy of your own compassion.

 

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Sources:

https://psychcentral.com/lib/tips-to-forgive-yourself#tips-for-self-forgiveness

https://psychcentral.com/lib/fixing-cognitive-distortions

https://www.healthline.com/health/how-to-forgive-yourself#2.-Acknowledge-the-mistake-out-loud

https://www.verywellmind.com/how-to-forgive-yourself-4583819